Underage Sex / Sex with a minor
Question:
I was recently caught having oral sex performed on me by a family friend, I'm 13 and he was 18.
It wasn't really my idea, it was his, but I did want to do it. I wasnt intoxicated and we didn't do any drugs. I've known him since i was 7 so i know him pretty well. I really don't want to get him trouble and since we didn't do anything else but oral so why is he being charged?
Answer:
Hey,
First off I just wanted to let you know that the reason he is being charged for "statutory rape" is because of the age of the parties involved, the sexual act that took place and fact that you are considered by law to be unable to legally consent to the behavior.
Let me explain in the easiest terms that I can;
Statutory rape laws are based on the concept that a young person may desire sex but may lack the experience possessed by legal adults to make a mature decision as to whether or not to have sexual contact with a particular person
He is 18, which in most places is considered an adult and as an adult there are certain responsibilities that a person faces, usually to do with what is morally, ethically and legally "right and wrong".
By making it illegal for an adult to have sex with a minor, statutory rape laws aim to give the minor some protection against adults in a position of power over the youth.
That being said, whether or not YOU wanted to, HE had no right placing a "child" (not my words so much as those of other adults, or one defined by law)in a situation that he/she is not ready for, or could know better to choose differently.
By having oral sex with him (which you said was his idea) and not using protection like a dental dam, he may have given you an Sexually Transmitted Disease. Is that something that as a 13 year old girl you are ready to deal with should it happen?
This is why the law is in place, to protect and save you from having to go through an experience that could be harmful to your health and over all well being.
Though you may not see what happened as being "wrong", he is an adult and knew better. Yet he did it anyways and now he has to face the consequences. Maybe it will be a lesson to him for the future and having a sexual relationship with a minor.
As for you, I suggest you go and get tested to make sure that you did not get an STI/STD. And in the future, if you want to keep someone out of trouble, listen to your own instincts and common sense and DO NOT engage in any sexually active behaviour with an adult.
Kara_Sutra
